“Home, when it’s inside of us, allows us to sit still.”
-Allison Moorer
I used to want to own an airstream. Now I want to be the airstream.
Heart is where the home is. Perhaps I have had this phrase turned around in my head all these years. It is not about going but welcoming and arriving. To be at home within myself and show up move-in ready to every day of my life. To know that I am enough and fully-equipped to handle whatever comes my way.
I have long been enamored with watching people who are fully at home in their body. As a creative type, I tend to see it most in artistic realms: musicians, artists, dancers. Yet, I can also spot it in athletic endeavors, such as weightlifting and yoga. My love affair with these two contrasting activities could result from my own presence in gripping the barbell or reclining on my mat. I treasure those rare moments when my physical self is fully in-tune and present with my mental self. A home not away from home.
In this latest phase, I am appreciating that life is not all about the outward adventure. Stillness evokes a sense of inner attunement. It is incredibly liberating to just show up and know you’ve got what it takes. Self-trust is the antidote to anxiety. Author and spiritual badass, Danielle LaPorte, suggests that self-knowledge is our super power. Somewhere between the ages of 5 and 40, I lost confidence in my inner calibration and started slipping down a slope of self-doubt. I was feeling stuck, not streamlined. As I get older, I’m recognizing that I can go inside myself and find whatever I need to move forward or “onward” (to borrow from the genius of Elizabeth Gilbert). It is such a sweet, sweet freedom.
So, yes, I hope to be the airstream that I want to see in my driveway. At times I might need to camp out by the fire to dance and sing with friends, but I also need moments of quiet solitude next to a babbling brook. The journey is not measured in maps and miles. Wherever my body ends up is right where my heart belongs. Showing up as our true selves could be the greatest and bravest gift we ever give to ourselves or the world.
JPS